I'm Not Going to Lie; Using BYU Internet Makes Me Paranoid

Seriously, it does. I always feel like there is someone in OIT monitoring everything that I am doing on the internet, as if he is paid to make sure I "hold to the rod." And every time I attempt to access a page that is blocked by BYU servers, whether I am aware it was or not, I feel like an additional flag goes by my name to tell that worker, "Heads up! This student maybe be deviating!"

I was getting on my computer tonight, of course to access the internet, and for some reason I was signed off of the internet. To use BYU internet, you have to sign in first so they know you're a student (and so they know who you are and what you're looking at). It was weird because normally I do not have to sign back in if my computer was just in sleep mode. Anyway, I went to sign in, and Firefox (that I have just recently converted to) warned me something about how I was trying to access one server, but another one was in the way (BYU). And then it said that "this server may be trying to intercept the information that you are transferring" or something. Basically, it was warning me that BYU could intercept anything that was going through my computer. And that creeps me out.

And ugh, AOL is extremely slow now. I used it to get passed the filter for MySpace and YouTube, but I guess they figured that the only way to stop AOL considering the way it works was by making it impossible to use. Ridiculous. Sorry for wanting to network with my friends back home or watch a YouTube video of stand-up or maybe dance.

Anyway, BYU has a few different filters. There is one for violence, sexual content, and then "Custom Block List." The last one is absolutely ridiculous. Those are the websites that BYU deems immoral for its students, but the rest of the world uses. Such websites are MySpace and YouTube. But wait, those sites might have PORN on them. Maybe, just maybe you'll stumble upon them and become addicted! Because no other website in the entire world will have an ad on it with something scandalous that BYU hasn't missed.

BYU is all-powerful in cyberspace, didn't you know? I feel excessively spiritual when I use the internet, as if President Samuelson himself was looking over my shoulder and approving each website I visited.

I think this censoring of the internet and everything we view does not make the world our campus, as BYU's slogan implies. Rather, it blocks out the real world. The bubble that is BYU campus does not help the students learn to cope in the real world; it numbs them to it, so they won't know what to do when they leave.

I am convinced, and I would totally invest in this TV show if it were considered, that I have a good idea for TV. I think there should be a reality show that follows Molly Mormons or Peter Priesthoods after they leave BYU to move into a larger city. New York, Los Angeles, New Orleans, or any sizeable city with enough stuff that doesn't meet the Honor Code to make their hair stand on ends. There could even be a portion to bet whether they can assimilate into the real world or if they move back to the Happy Valley! That show would make bank. MTV, where are you?

Cynical, yes. But realistic, too.